“Knowing me, knowing you,
There is nothing we can do
We just have to face it, this time we’re through
Breaking up is never easy, I know but I have to go
Knowing me, knowing you
It’s the best I can do.”
- “Knowing Me, Knowing You” by Abba
As the end of the year approaches and resolutions are on the rise, I always consider all the reasons I have to be thankful and grateful. I also examine what is intrinsic in my life and what might need a refresher, a revitalization, or maybe just the good ol’ swift kick in the arse out the door.
I abhor clutter.
AF Henley: And dust.
Yes, that too, but clutter is especially insulting to my sensibilities. I have no problem throwing out clothing I’ve not worn in a year or paperwork that’s useless or trinkets that are merely taking up space and not placekeeping a memory near and dear to me.
But that’s just stuff. Things. The crap we all know you can’t take with you, (though it can be very shiny while we’re here).
People and relationships? Those are rough. Of course they are. They should be. I’m the person who still talks to the best friend she had when she was eight. My mother and I speak daily. Even my father and I visit, and if ever there was someone who should have been permanently cut out, it probably should have been him.
Part of the problem for me is knowing when it’s time to let go and move on. Sometimes it’s easier than others. When there’s namecalling and general animosity and impossible expectations? Well… that’s a tad easier than when there’s nothing terribly specific, just a vague sense of discomfort. I still remember the morning I woke up next to a boyfriend I’d had for, oh, three years? And we looked at one another and neither of us could think of a single thing keeping us together except habit and time. Even then, it was hard, and not entirely permanent. It’s been ten years, and he still says happy birthday and I still send him movie recommendations.
That same boyfriend had a catch phrase that I still like: “You either grow together, or you grow apart.” I love people. I love knowing them, trying to understand them, helping them become whatever they want to be.
AF Henley: Short of them wanting to be a serial killer or a self-destructive nutjob.
Well, true. And the nutjobs do sometimes make the task of leaving easier. Like that guy I used to know who told me (while we were driving in the middle of the night in the center of nowhere) that Jesus had told him he needed to be armed at all times, and I heard the Glock cock. I admired his piece, told him I felt so much safer with him knowing he’d protect me, and then I never. Spoke. To him. Again.
But most people fall short of the total Gun Toting Jesus Freak.
AF Henley: Even in the South?
They are a more common breed here, but yeah, even down below the ol’ Mason Dixon. Most people are, to quote my mother, “Doing the best with what they’ve got” and are deserving of our respect or sympathy.
And it’s when one of those people leaves my life that I feel it most sharply. I recently parted ways with a friend of mine. We’d not been close in years, and there were very few signs of life there, but even when it makes sense to go, it makes me wonder. There’s a fine line between taking care and taking shit, and when the shoveling gets too hard on the back, it’s usually a sure sign to wish well and wander away.
But still. You wonder. You hope. You think a lot about all the people who’ve come and gone and come again. People are with you for a reason, a season, or a lifetime, right?
The first two are just harder for me to spot.
I contemplate people enough that when writing Meet Me at the Gates, it was simultaneously simple and heartbreaking to write Hydee, who has for all her life known she is connected to one specific human being. But the distance between them seems impossible. The attempts she’s made to close the gap have failed. She’s losing hope. She’s on the brink of giving up.
Fate intervenes, as it does in both fiction and also real life. And I suppose, that’s what I should remember, too. Fate has a way of taking you where you need to be and allowing you to meet whom you need to meet.
Even if it seems crazy or impossible. Or both.
I suppose if Hydee can have hope, then so can I.
AF Henley: Hear, hear. *raises wine glass*
Kelly Wyre: *Clinks*
Much love and happiest of holidays with those whom you love who love you,
PS – Many thanks to Henley for the song choice at the beginning. 😀
A supernatural reincarnation romance novel.
Outer Banks bookstore owner Hyacinth Silver Fox has a secret millennia in the making: her soul was magically entwined with another, and at night she dreams of every lifetime they’ve ever spent together. The rules of their magic are simple: Hydee always knows her lover, but he, or she, doesn’t remember her. It’s up to Hydee to find and make her soulmate see they are destined for each other, and this lifetime is no different, but there’s one problem: her soulmate is Theo Monk, heartthrob actor and Hollywood’s sometime-infamous bad boy. Hydee’s hope of reuniting is wearing thin, but she has no idea how dire the situation really is.
Because meanwhile in California, Theo Monk is losing his mind. Anxiety and paranoia rule his life, along with his on-again-off-again girlfriend and her entourage. When fear and frustration push him to an edge, Theo cuts and runs as far from his problems as he can without knowing Fate’s giving him one last shot to unite with the only person who can help him. Hydee and Theo must save one another before hope runs out and Hydee’s despair and Theo’s fear keep them apart forever.
Kelly Wyre enjoys reading and writing all manner of fiction, ranging from horror to romance. She used to work in advertising but is now happily chained to her writing desk and laptop. She believes she’s here to tell stories and to connect people with them. She’s written several novels, novellas, and short stories and has no plans on stopping anytime soon.
Kelly relishes the soft and cuddly and the sharp and bloody with equal amounts of enthusiasm. She’s a coffee addict, an avid movie lover, a chronic night owl, and she loves a good thunderstorm. Currently Kelly resides in the southeastern United States.
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