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She let out an exasperated breath. “No. No, I gotta figure this out.” She turned to face me, legs crossed, intertwined. “I don’t know what to do, Merrick.”
I felt it in my chest. She was lost, pleading for help. I didn’t know if I was the best person to help her. I’d lived just as fucked up a life myself. From the age I could run, I did, staying at friend’s houses almost every day of the week, stopping home quick after school just to make sure my mom hadn’t overdosed and was dead on the floor. I did this almost my whole life…up until I ran here.
“I can’t really help you, babe, if I don’t know what happened,” I told her as sympathetically as I could, looking into her sad eyes. Even if I wasn’t the most qualified person to give advice, I wanted to help, but I also needed to know what happened first.
Kayla rubbed her face with her hands, keeping them over her eyes for a minute longer. She was thinking; questioning if she was ready to spill. I didn’t want to force her to do it, so I sat there quietly. I wish I could just sweep her up and run far, far away; take her away from all the bad in her life permanently, but that would mean I had to run again, and I was done running. I couldn’t do it anymore.
“I loved him.” Her voice was a whisper. She removed her hands from her face but only to look down to her crisscrossed feet. She couldn’t look at me while she told me, and I was okay with that. “I let my guard down when I knew I shouldn’t have, but I couldn’t help it.”
Some may consider me a jack of all trades, but I consider myself well rounded. I’ve waitressed, styled hair, answered phones and, most recently, worked full time as mom to my two beautiful little boys. Then there was this book… Everyone and their brother started talking about this book series titled Fifty Shades of Grey by EL James. I didn’t really pay attention to the craze at first, since I wasn’t a big reader- okay, I didn’t read at all. But curiosity got the best of me, so I downloaded it to my kindle. I was immediately hooked. I read the whole series in three days. Yes, three books in three days. I kept finding all these great books that I HAD to read (just ask my credit card!). Then I started hearing voices. Voices that turned into stories; stories that were begging to get out of my head. I started writing them down on scraps of paper. Then I transferred them to my computer. Before I knew it, Planning on Forever was born. The voices in my head are still talking, so I’m still writing.